Ever had one of those days when it seems like everything is working against you? You know – those days when the work is never-ending, your children barrage you with request after request and piles of laundry stalk you from the corner?
It’s easy to get worked up or feel guilty when the irritation/impatience is steaming from your ears. Mothers are supposed to be naturally patient and even tempered, right? Well, not quite! Patience is actually a skill and skills require intentional practice to master. So rest easy knowing that patience isn’t just bestowed upon everyone – most of us have got to be intentional about the practice!
Practicing some or all of these strategies may help you gain better control and flex your patience muscle the next time things seems to be boiling over:
1. Show love
If your toddler (or even teenager) is clinging to your ankles begging for your attention – take that negative energy that is rising to your throat and say/do something positive. Grab your kiddos and squeeze them (in a loving way, of course!) and say “I love you.” Or take a second to play a quick game with them or to give them the attention they are seeking.
This works with strangers/co-workers too. Reached your limit at work? Compliment someone or pay it forward when you buy your next coffee/snack, giving a coworker a nice treat! Expending the negative energy by doing something positive allows you to do something in those moments that will actually shift your perspective and energy.
2. Count the good
On those days where seeing the light at the end of the tunnel feels near impossible, taking just 3 minutes (you can use a timer!) to write down the things that make you smile can be a positive energy booster. What are you grateful for? Write it out! When you’re done you may want to keep this list to pull out the next time these feelings arise.
3. Change the vibe
If things are feeling a little tense in the office or at home – consider putting on your favorite tunes. Play a song that takes you to a happy memory or less stressful time in life. Your memories are always accessible and much closer than the weekend or your next vacation.
4. Prioritize self-care
Don’t just say you’ll do it – make room on your schedule. Set specific times and days – even if just 10-15 minutes, once or twice a week! Pick an activity and commit to it – you’re worth it!
- Take a walk.
- Follow a guided meditation.
- Take a hot bath with lavender oil.
- Hit the gym/follow a workout video.
5. Join a mom group
Being a mom can often feel lonely in the workplace and even among friends/colleagues. Finding a mom meet-up might be just the thing you need! Mom groups offer a safe space to air your loving grievances and frustrations without feeling guilty because, trust me, you won’t be the only one! These groups allow you to feel normal about what’s going on and give you the extra push you need to keep going! Don’t worry, there are mom groups of all kinds – ones for working moms, single moms, hiking moms, crafty moms, etc! A little internet browsing can help you find a community that suits you!
There’s no denying you have a lot on your plate, mama. Don’t try to bear it all without checking in with yourself and acknowledging that it’s tough!
Author: Briana Myrie